I finally got my house looking clean, it was great when my husband returned! Since then its become a little messy, but not a mess, if that makes any sense. It doesn't help that we've adopted a 80lbs black lab, who is not exactly house broken, and sheds like crazy! Not to mention work has been completely insane for in, and fairly insane for me as well. I'm in the final stages of checking out of my current command, and I'm due to report (no later than) May 5th. I should (hopefully) be checking out completely on Monday. I'm hoping to head to the Social Security office in hopes to change my name legally (still haven't done it and been married over a year!) before I report. I also need to call the DMV in North Carolina to get my name changed on my driver's license.
I'm both nervous and excited about checking into my ship, and I know that my schedule will probably be pretty crazy once I do.
This week I've come to a pretty strong realization, and a somewhat saddening one at that. I had this insane idea that once AJ returned from deployment we'd have this normal married life. You know, coming home from work, having dinner together, enjoying our weekends together, ect ect. That's definitely not the case, and probably won't be the case for a long time. We've had one weekend together since we've started working, and I've only cooked a handful of times. He gets off work late, so he eats dinner there, leaving me no real reason to cook. We get maybe 2 hours together before time for him to go to bed, and that's if he stays up late. Not to mention he's exhausted.
All this makes me wonder how in the world we were possibly considering bringing a baby into this world. We have no time for each other, the dog could probably use more attention, how could be have time for a helpless child! I can't imagine having a child when its father would almost never be around.
I wonder if maybe I'm just not giving us enough time to get into a 'normal' schedule, but at the same time, I really don't think so. I know other people do it though....
I think I'm mostly just frustrated because I had this fantasy and real life isn't living up to it.
On the domestic end, I haven't done much that I'd planned to do. I haven't created a meal plan past the first one, I haven't cooked more than twice a week, I've slacked big time clipping and organizing coupons, I haven't gone grocery shopping since AJ got back from deployment. I'm so happy he's home, but I wish we could have some small piece of a normal home life. For now I think I'm going to have to be happy with the fact that we sleep in the same bed.
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